( If only he could communicate to him that this isn't some shallow fixation on how Lalli looks. Emil looks up again and no he can see the back of his friend's head. The jagged, mismatched strands are so much more noticeable, one even long enough to be missed altogether.
The longer he stares, the more a dark pit forms in his chest and the harder it is to exhale properly. Being truthful, a regular, self-given haircut would probably look a lot like this. But knowing it's after his nightmare, and coupled with how much screwing up Emil has done lately...this isn't coincidental. This was an act of upset, not simple practicality or a need to get the hair off of his neck.
So he's got to think about how upset Lalli would have to be to hold a knife, stare into a mirror like it's a void and slash at his hair until he can't or doesn't want to anymore.
And that also includes just how much he himself has contributed to that numb yet sharp feeling he knows has burrowed into the Finn's own chest. )
No. ( Another word that slips out accidentally, but that feels too jagged to continue. But it's not fine. The opposite. If only he could find someway to explain himself that wasn't pathetic. That's not the case, so he answers a question that previously went ignored. ) I'm not hungry.
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The longer he stares, the more a dark pit forms in his chest and the harder it is to exhale properly. Being truthful, a regular, self-given haircut would probably look a lot like this. But knowing it's after his nightmare, and coupled with how much screwing up Emil has done lately...this isn't coincidental. This was an act of upset, not simple practicality or a need to get the hair off of his neck.
So he's got to think about how upset Lalli would have to be to hold a knife, stare into a mirror like it's a void and slash at his hair until he can't or doesn't want to anymore.
And that also includes just how much he himself has contributed to that numb yet sharp feeling he knows has burrowed into the Finn's own chest. )
No. ( Another word that slips out accidentally, but that feels too jagged to continue. But it's not fine. The opposite. If only he could find someway to explain himself that wasn't pathetic. That's not the case, so he answers a question that previously went ignored. ) I'm not hungry.