❰ for what it's worth, lalli's (gradually, thoughtlessly) fixing that messy spot, not making it worse. there are times when he does make it worse, times when he's alright with making emil feel affectionately harassed, but now isn't quite one of those times.
'you're going scouting soon, right?' hm. he definitely should, something feels unsettling about forgoing it - but on every practical level, it's not like there's some ever-present danger left unattended if he doesn't. not like back in keuruu, or the silent world. lives are almost certainly not on the line.
so instead of an answer, a question: ❱ Am I? ❰ for some, it might be a trick question. lalli doesn't ask trick questions. he doesn't ask questions in which he's already leaning heavily toward one answer or another, because then he'd just... choose that answer.
no, the decision this time lies entirely with emil. ❱
❰ It's actually a surprise that the answer is posed as a question, one that he feels like he has some say in the correctness of. Lalli is typically a 'yes' or 'no' type person, so Emil doesn't give an answer immediately.
On one hand, Lalli probably wants to go in some capacity. Maybe it's not some pressing need that can't be suppressed, but again: he's a scout. Scouts...scout. It's a cornerstone of his sense of purpose and identity.
And on the other, for him to leave would mean that this comforting moment of warmth would also go along with him. It's not like he'll never have the chance for this ever again -- far from it, with any luck -- but the feeling of this closeness right now is one he'd like to marinate in for a bit longer. ❱
Maybe in a little while. ❰ That's a good compromise, right? Lalli can leave in a while, if Emil has any sway in the actual outcome here, and in the meantime he can enjoy togetherness he's missed out on in the meantime. The hand cupping Lalli's side moves slightly, a small rub back and forth. If he was entirely selfish and requested a leave of absence from scouting for the day, he'd be brave enough to move higher, even abandoning the feel of fabric for one of skin. ❱
❰ is it really so surprising, that emil has some sort of sway? from the start he's managed to tug or push lalli into one thing or another, as much of a fuss as the finn seems to make.
the acquiescence of emil's request comes in the form of a vague hum, a slight nudging of the swede's nose with his own before he relaxes into the position they've chosen to lay. the fingers combing thoughtlessly through the ends of emil's hair drop now to let the pad of his middle finger trace featherlight along the line of his jaw and the tickling texture of his morning stubble.
if he was entirely selfish and requested a leave of absence for the day, lalli would've done it. he wouldn't have even been all that bothered. maybe next time, emil will be so brave. to ask. to touch. there's no guarantee that lalli won't be terribly ticklish, of course. in fact, as unused to touch as he is, i'd bet on the probability of it. ❱
❰ Forgive him that he hasn't settled into the reality that he has such sway with Lalli, someone who under most circumstances would put his duty above all else. As he settles into this thought, that he comes before this important consideration, Emil smiles and rethinks his previous weighing of options.
The trace of the finger, even as slight as it is, makes it easier to backtrack, as well as his hand that moves out of its previous zone of back-and-forth motion, lower until he can feel the hem of the covering shirt hit his own fingers.
This time the upward motion is against skin, smooth and slightly warm. Emil yet again stops at that floating rib, absorbing the tactile difference between soft flesh and the hardened bone under his hand. It's not as if it's the first time; his hand was just there seconds ago -- but the difference that just the millimetre of fabric makes to his heart is unexpectedly vast.
They're nose to nose, a convenient fact considering how much he'd currently like to kiss him. ❱
❰ it's bolder than usual. that's the excuse lalli finds for the slow, barely-level intake of breath as bare fingertips skate up along his middle. he expected something like that to tickle, to itch, to be too much somehow - and it is, enough so that his eyes have closed against even an ounce more stimulus, but it's the kind of 'too much' that lalli doesn't object to as much as he feels like he should. he's gone still by now, but that shouldn't deter emil too much - the finn has never had any problem letting anyone know if he doesn't want something, in words or discontented sounds or just moving away from them, and he's doing none of those things. just... processing.
then eyes flutter open again, gaze piercing into emil's as he finally lets out his breath, just as slow as he took it in. the hand that still hovers around the swede's jaw finds his hair again, giving the slightest tug at a lock of it in case he's overthinking. ❱
❰ No, a displeased Lalli is one he's all too familiar with. Frosty and distant, sharp and angular in form and feeling. Right now, he can feel a certain tension under the skin he's currently touch, now much more intimately in tune with the breath Lalli just took.
They're already close, a few inches separating anything but their faces, but Emil's grip tightens slightly as he moves to finally kiss the scout, position's work postponed just for him, and pulling Lalli ever closer. It's soft, against the side of his mouth, but he remains present. One kiss, then another.
He's never plainly stated that he wants this, wants more than this, even. Emil told him plainly he'd thought of kissing him, wanting to hold him. These are only a handful of his personal, private desires -- though eventually, he'd like if they became less so, even slowly but surely. ❱
❰ lalli has never quite been one to understand people - how they act, what they say - but this? this, he understands. not in his head, but in the rest of him. as relatively new as all of this is, and as much as he hates new situations and the way they throw him off-balance, this feels... hm. it feels like something that played out in a dream that he can't quite remember, familiar and nonetheless not. maybe it did. lalli doesn't think that he dreams any actual dreams here, but if he does, emil's hands on his skin aren't an unlikely topic to dream about.
so when he's tugged in closer, he shifts just enough to press into emil of his own volition, present in this. the kisses to the side of his mouth earn an impatient sort of mrr in his throat, tilting his chin just enough for the next kiss to meet more directly. ❱
❰ Lalli more present against him sends a sharp hum through Emil's body, slightly shocking. They've kissed many times now. It's a usual activity; it's lost the novelty, but the feeling it gives him only intensifies. This is true now as well, but there's this distinct difference. Not just this emotional fulfilment is present, there's also this niggling physical absence that he's compelled to try and fill.
It doesn't help that Lalli's also moved his head, making the kiss more complete. And that noise...the one Lalli makes out of mild annoyance that something isn't right or happening at the moment he'd like it to. In this situation it's...alluring? Whatever the correct adjective, it makes the kiss deeper, and it feels like as close as they are currently it just isn't enough.
His gripping hand backtracks down the curve of his boyfriend's side, back to the hem of that fabric again. Instead of sliding under, Emil collects it in folds as he moves upward again. They're laying down, so it won't come off easy, but his brain doesn't currently consider this among the swirling desires of needing to feel this skin more closely, and to see it clearly in front of him. ❱
❰ they may have kissed many times now, but rarely have they kissed like this. lalli's not sure why, anymore. maybe they should have.
now emil's hand slides back down and lalli's middle tenses, preparing for the inadvertent tickle of light fingertips on skin - but instead, the swede grabs a handful of shirt and drags it upward. lalli's brow knits, confused about how exactly this demand's going to be met the way they are now, but he tries to wriggle a bit to oblige and let the shirt inch its way out from under him. his free hand, the one tangled in blonde hair, drops down out of the way of emil's endeavor to instead slip feather-light fingers under the hem of the swede's own shirt. ❱
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'you're going scouting soon, right?' hm. he definitely should, something feels unsettling about forgoing it - but on every practical level, it's not like there's some ever-present danger left unattended if he doesn't. not like back in keuruu, or the silent world. lives are almost certainly not on the line.
so instead of an answer, a question: ❱ Am I? ❰ for some, it might be a trick question. lalli doesn't ask trick questions. he doesn't ask questions in which he's already leaning heavily toward one answer or another, because then he'd just... choose that answer.
no, the decision this time lies entirely with emil. ❱
no subject
On one hand, Lalli probably wants to go in some capacity. Maybe it's not some pressing need that can't be suppressed, but again: he's a scout. Scouts...scout. It's a cornerstone of his sense of purpose and identity.
And on the other, for him to leave would mean that this comforting moment of warmth would also go along with him. It's not like he'll never have the chance for this ever again -- far from it, with any luck -- but the feeling of this closeness right now is one he'd like to marinate in for a bit longer. ❱
Maybe in a little while. ❰ That's a good compromise, right? Lalli can leave in a while, if Emil has any sway in the actual outcome here, and in the meantime he can enjoy togetherness he's missed out on in the meantime. The hand cupping Lalli's side moves slightly, a small rub back and forth. If he was entirely selfish and requested a leave of absence from scouting for the day, he'd be brave enough to move higher, even abandoning the feel of fabric for one of skin. ❱
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the acquiescence of emil's request comes in the form of a vague hum, a slight nudging of the swede's nose with his own before he relaxes into the position they've chosen to lay. the fingers combing thoughtlessly through the ends of emil's hair drop now to let the pad of his middle finger trace featherlight along the line of his jaw and the tickling texture of his morning stubble.
if he was entirely selfish and requested a leave of absence for the day, lalli would've done it. he wouldn't have even been all that bothered. maybe next time, emil will be so brave. to ask. to touch. there's no guarantee that lalli won't be terribly ticklish, of course. in fact, as unused to touch as he is, i'd bet on the probability of it. ❱
no subject
The trace of the finger, even as slight as it is, makes it easier to backtrack, as well as his hand that moves out of its previous zone of back-and-forth motion, lower until he can feel the hem of the covering shirt hit his own fingers.
This time the upward motion is against skin, smooth and slightly warm. Emil yet again stops at that floating rib, absorbing the tactile difference between soft flesh and the hardened bone under his hand. It's not as if it's the first time; his hand was just there seconds ago -- but the difference that just the millimetre of fabric makes to his heart is unexpectedly vast.
They're nose to nose, a convenient fact considering how much he'd currently like to kiss him. ❱
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then eyes flutter open again, gaze piercing into emil's as he finally lets out his breath, just as slow as he took it in. the hand that still hovers around the swede's jaw finds his hair again, giving the slightest tug at a lock of it in case he's overthinking. ❱
no subject
They're already close, a few inches separating anything but their faces, but Emil's grip tightens slightly as he moves to finally kiss the scout, position's work postponed just for him, and pulling Lalli ever closer. It's soft, against the side of his mouth, but he remains present. One kiss, then another.
He's never plainly stated that he wants this, wants more than this, even. Emil told him plainly he'd thought of kissing him, wanting to hold him. These are only a handful of his personal, private desires -- though eventually, he'd like if they became less so, even slowly but surely. ❱
no subject
so when he's tugged in closer, he shifts just enough to press into emil of his own volition, present in this. the kisses to the side of his mouth earn an impatient sort of mrr in his throat, tilting his chin just enough for the next kiss to meet more directly. ❱
no subject
It doesn't help that Lalli's also moved his head, making the kiss more complete. And that noise...the one Lalli makes out of mild annoyance that something isn't right or happening at the moment he'd like it to. In this situation it's...alluring? Whatever the correct adjective, it makes the kiss deeper, and it feels like as close as they are currently it just isn't enough.
His gripping hand backtracks down the curve of his boyfriend's side, back to the hem of that fabric again. Instead of sliding under, Emil collects it in folds as he moves upward again. They're laying down, so it won't come off easy, but his brain doesn't currently consider this among the swirling desires of needing to feel this skin more closely, and to see it clearly in front of him. ❱
no subject
now emil's hand slides back down and lalli's middle tenses, preparing for the inadvertent tickle of light fingertips on skin - but instead, the swede grabs a handful of shirt and drags it upward. lalli's brow knits, confused about how exactly this demand's going to be met the way they are now, but he tries to wriggle a bit to oblige and let the shirt inch its way out from under him. his free hand, the one tangled in blonde hair, drops down out of the way of emil's endeavor to instead slip feather-light fingers under the hem of the swede's own shirt. ❱